Calling all Employers

Juan is my supervisor on the third shift.   He’s a nice kid, but still a little confused.   Wading his way through all the news static he was astute enough to make this boneheaded remark, Jim, the Democrats are ahead now, right?

I hope not Juan.   If they win I’m going to have to cut your salary ten percent.

Why Jim, Why?

Because those Democrats are going to raise my taxes, and I’m going to have to cut everyone’s salary to pay for it.   But don’t worry, I am optimistic that we’ll get McCain and he won’t be as bad as all the conservatives fear; you’re going to vote for the Republican, right?!

Oh yes Jim, yes I am.

Isn’t it funny how that works?

If you ask  Democrats why they feel justified in raising taxes on the rich , they’ll say, They don’t need the money anyway or they’ll make some other equally scurrilous and moronic comment Rich people screwed the little guy to get their money.

Rich people could not have possibly have worked their tails off to become rich, oh No!   They took advantage of the poor; and the poor have so much to take advantage of, every month they get a brick of government cheese!   Every rich guy I know is aggrieved over that damn cheese.    

Did you ever think, maybe the poor don’t need the money anyway ?   Think about it.   What do they need money for?

You can fill up at Taco Bell for five bucks, and you can make ten bucks in an hour washing a car.   Certainly, poor people can find three cars to wash a day!

Poor people are all too fat anyway, sitting around staring at Oprah not doing anything, eating potato chips.  

Poor people don’t have big houses with big electric bills.   Al Gore doesn’t want poor people to have big houses; all the electricity they use, we might heat up the earth another half a degree in the next hundred years, YIKES!  

Poor people don’t have to pay expensive gardeners to mow those big water wasting lawns, they don’t have employees and large payrolls, and they don’t have to match all those Social Security taxes on those large payrolls either!  

It seems to me we ought to be increasing taxes on the poor and reducing them on the wealthy.   That’s what we need.

Those poor people just aren’t paying their fair share.   Bastards.   Tax the parasites, tax the parasites!

I think the poor are unfairly represented and get to vote too much.   Votes ought to be apportioned according to how much we pay in taxes.   Screw that one man one vote nonsense, let’s do the one tax dollar one vote program!   Don’t worry libs, you’ve still got all of Hollywood, George Soros, and all the Ivy League brats, with rich mommies and daddies, who’ve yet to work a day in their lives.   There are plenty of lefty votes there.

Maybe we’d be better off with the IQ vote system.   If you’re under a 100, no vote for you!   That would decimate the Democratic Party.

O.K., I agree, we should just leave the voting system alone, but we need to do like the Democrats always decry; share the pain!  

All employers need to get together and cut salaries on all of their employees by the same amount that Barack Obama raises our taxes.

When your people complain about the cuts, just tell them

You don’t need the money anyway!

Copyright 2008 Jim Pontillo